When Tears Fade

Fun In A Time Sorrow

2005-10-28T19:20:00.000-07:00

FOUR THINGS YOU USE EVERYDAY:
1. laptop
2. cellphone
3. alarm clock
4. watch
FOUR JOBS YOU'VE HAD IN YOUR LIFE:
1. E.M. Heath's
2. Walmart
3. Curb Event Center
4. Pembroke Front Desk
FOUR FRIENDS YOU COULD TRUST WITH YOUR LIFE:
1. Natalie
2. Chris
3. Kim
4. Dorothy
FOUR TV SHOWS YOU WATCH THE MOST:
1. CSI
2. Saturday Night Live
3. Robot Chicken
4. Family Guy
FOUR PEOPLE YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE LAST:
1. Natalie
2. The guy covering the Service Desk at Walmart in Gilford, NH
3. The guy whose number is 524.8011(instead of 528.8011 which is the aforementioned Walmart's number)
4. Eileen
FOUR MOVIES YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER:
1. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
2. The Jerk
3. Chicago
4. Pirates of the Caribbean
FOUR THINGS YOU WANNA DO IN LIFE:
1. Get married
2. Have children and be a good mother to them
3. Travel around the world
4. Donate a bunch of money to my church and high school
FOUR FAMILY MEMBERS YOU'RE CLOSE TO:
1. My Mom
2. My Dad
3. Aunt Karen
4. Ryan (brother)
FOUR PLACES YOU'VE BEEN ON VACATION TO:
1. Disney World
2. Orlando, Fl
3. Washington D.C.
4. Beaver Falls, Penn.
FOUR WEBSITES YOU VISIT DAILY:
1. facebook.com
2. my.yahoo.com
3. gmail.com
4. myspace.com
FOUR OF YOUR ALL TIME FAVORITE RESTAURANTS:
1. The Homestead
2. Applebee's
3. O'Charley's
4. The Soda Shoppe
FOUR PEOPLE THAT CAN ALWAYS MAKE YOU SMILE/LAUGH:
1. Natalie
2. Dorothy
3. Jade
4. Eileen
FOUR COSTUMES YOU'VE WORN ON HALLOWEEN:
1. Never
2. Dressed
3. Up For
4. Halloween

Chivalry

2005-10-22T21:32:00.000-07:00

I found this through xuqa.com and rather like it. The parts in the parenthesis are the interpretations of the person who posted it on xuqa. Enjoy.

The Twelve Chief Rules in Love
From The Art of Courtly Love by Andreas Capellanus

1. Thou shalt avoid avarice like the deadly pestilence and shalt embrace its opposite.
(Don't be greedy)
2. Thou shalt keep thyself chaste for the sake of her whom thou lovest.
(Save yourself for marriage, alternately, don't sleep around, depending on how you define love.)
3. Thou shalt not knowingly strive to break up a correct love affair that someone else is engaged in.
(Don't mack on someone else's girl)
4. Thou shalt not chose for thy love anyone whom a natural sense of shame forbids thee to marry.
(Don't date those who you can't stand -- go after the girls who actually interest you)
5. Be mindful completely to avoid falsehood.
(Don't be a lying fuck)
6. Thou shalt not have many who know of thy love affair.
(Don't kiss and tell)
7. Being obedient in all things to the commands of ladies, thou shalt ever strive to ally thyself to the service of Love.
(Because you should respect the wishes of ladies, you should attempt to always take care of your lady) [THIS is the point that you all are debating]
8. In giving and receiving love's solaces let modesty be ever present.
(Stay away from the perverted shit)
9. Thou shalt speak no evil.
(Don't call your ex-girlfriend a dirty whore on your blog)
10. Thou shalt not be a revealer of love affairs.
(Don't sleep and tell)
11. Thou shalt be in all things polite and courteous.
(Be polite and courteous, always)
12. In practising the solaces of love thou shalt not exceed the desires of thy lover.
(Stop means stop. No means no.)

Fun Little Things

2005-10-05T21:08:00.000-07:00

I stole this from Dorothy's xanga... I couldn't help myself, it looked fun and I'm bored.

.: x Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4. Write down what it says:

" 'Well, I have a trade of my own. I suppose I am the only one in this world.' " ~Sir Arhtur Conan Doyle, The Complete Sherlock Holmes, Volume 1

.: x Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first?

My roommate's bed

.: x What is the last thing you watched on TV?

The Red Sox @ the White Sox... ALDS

.: x Without looking, guess what time it is:

11:17pm

.: x Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?

11:16pm not bad!

.: x With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?

The air conditioner and the people in the apt. above me

.: x When did you last step outside? What were you doing?

Around 9:15 tonight to get my package from the mail

.: x Before you started this survey, what did you look at?

A few xanga sites

.: x What are you wearing?

A Red Sox ALCS Champs 2004 t-shirt and Snoopy and Woodstock men's pj pants. Snoopy is wearing a sweater and cap and holding a golf club, and Woodstock is holding a sign that says "Snoopy +52 But he has a nice sweater" .... They are great pants

.: x Did you dream last night?

Yes I did, but now I don't remember what it was about, just that it was a good dream.

.: x When did you last laugh?

A few minutes ago when I read Bekah's info and it said "Friends don't let friends date mullets"

.: x What is on the walls of the room you are in?

A few posters and pictures

.: x Seen anything weird lately?

Yeah, Derek Jeter and Hidecki Matsui running ridiculously akwardly!

.: x What do you think of this quiz?

It's fun, that's why I am taking it

.: x What is the last film you saw?

Superstar with Molly Shannon and Will Ferrell

.: x If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?

A bunch of DVDs and CDs including, but not limited to, Fraggle Rock season 1, The Jetsons, The Flintones, Johnny Quest, David Crowder's new cd, the Chicago and Dirty Dancing soundtracks, and the latest Lifehouse cd.

.: x Tell me something about you that I don't know:

ummm...... that kinda depends on who you are... uhh, I actually like Sam's Choice Cola better than Coke... which is infinately better than Pepsi

.: x If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?

World Peace?? jk. I would want people to recognize what things are good and bad, based on a Biblical standard and adhere to that... if that makes sense

.: x Do you like to dance?

of course I do!

.: x Do you like George Bush:

yup, I voted for him

.: x Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?

ooh.... right now I really like the name Hayley/Hailey/Haylie

.: x Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?

that's a bit harder... I'm going with.... Paul, Adam, James, or Scott (these are shockingly normal for me!)

.: x Would you ever consider living abroad?

sure, Australia would be cool, and I might study abroad in Italy or London

.: x What is the question you're expecting the least on this quiz?

this one

ok, that was fun. I'm done now.... at least for this time around. I need to think about that baby names question more... I feel as though my boy names are quite good enough for me.... too much thought!!!!! BAD! goodnight

All Roads Lead to Belmont...

2005-08-30T11:37:00.000-07:00

Ok, well at least you can get to Belmont by traveling I-93 and I-80. There are a few more roads in there, but those are the two big ones I remember. So yeah, I'm back at Belmont now. In fact I'm sitting in my room in my apartment as I type. I have my fish back and I've been to Refuge. Life is good. I got to see Rob play Saturday. Good show. Short, but good. It was great to see him. I saw Aaron for the first time since before Christmas break on Sunday and again yesterday. It was equally great to see him. I didn't realize how much I missed everyone down here until I saw them. I've also seen Matt Murphy, Wes, Scott, Molley, and Betsy as well as everyone else like Rachel, Tetra, Eileen, Jade, ect. It really is great being back. I'm finally getting settled in and I've seen almost everyone I've wanted to see.

I got a job working the desk at Pembroke. That has already proven to be very interesting. It will be a fun semester. I work every Friday from 6-10(pm). This Friday and next, though, I'm working 6-1am because I'm covering for the guy that comes in after me. He has to play at a wedding or something. I don't care, I get more hours. The RAs there are pretty awesome. Zach, Mitch, and Brady. Zach was the RA on duty last week and I think he is this week too. He's a very cool guy I must say.

In other news, Knowledge of Blaze and Knowledge rapped to me on Saturday night at the RockU concert(where Rob played). It was by far one of the most entertaining things every to happen to me. I laughed so hard. Heck, I'm still laughing. The important thing of that night is that I got to see and talk to Rob. I even got a picture of us. Rob is awesome. Most of the people I know here are, but, yeah, shut up Aimee.

I do miss home a lot. It's really really hard being here right now. My family has to be out of our house.... tomorrow. When I left to come down I had to say good-bye to the house that I've lived in my whole life, the house that my grandfather built, the house that has been in my family since the 1950's. It was really hard. Saying goodbye to 19 years of life is tough. The hardest part is knowing that when I go home to visit I'm not going home. I'm going to a condo in Gilford right next to Natalie and a two minute drive from Walmart(as if I 'don't spend enough of my time there). Maybe I'll just take Rob's advice and not go back home to live. Who knows. I'll figure it out. It's all up to God where I wind up.

In other and final news I've decided that I think I'll get married this coming summer. I'm not sure who I'll marry, but I'm going to get married. Until next time....

Dag

2005-07-21T17:43:00.000-07:00

It's been a looong time since I last wrote here. April 29 to be exact. Currently I'm watching Legends of the Hidden Temple(you know you're jealous). In case you didn't know, I sprained my wrist. I thought I might have tendonitis, but it seems to be healing quickly so I'm pretty sure it's just a sprain. This is good news. Walmart working is going pretty well. I work with some great people which makes work a lot better. I'm starting to miss people from school, but at the same time I'm not horribly eager to get back and start classes. I'm nervous about my classes for this semester. I'm also beginning to think that I will have little or no life this semester cause I desperately need to focus on my studies which, considering my classes, may take up all my time. Oh well, life goes on and as long as I can make it to Refuge every Tuesday, I'll be all set.

Soul Fest is coming and I'm getting more and more excited the closer it gets. So many good bands over a span of five days that I get to enjoy with a bunch of my friends. What could you ask for? Tickets to a Red Sox game two days later? Done! I got 4 tickets to a Red Sox/Rangers game. Oh man, I can't wait!!! Ryan, Natalie, and Christa are joining me which will be a total blast! I always have fun hanging out with them individually, so the four of us combined seeing the Red Sox live will be more fun than is imaginable!

Now I'm getting hungry and therefore am going to eat some dinner. As Kip would say, "Peace Out"

My Schedule (pronounced more like shedu-al)

2005-04-28T11:53:00.000-07:00

It's official. I am registered for my classes for next semester. It's quite the happy feeling too... now if only I could finish this paper... Anyway, in effort to procrastinate just a little bit longer, I am giving you all my schedule as it stands(and I don't plan on changing it).

Monday: Mass Media 9-9:50; Programming I 11-11:50; Intermediate Italian I 1-1:50; Step Aerobics 2-2:50

Tuesday: Introduction to Sociology 9:30-10:45

Wednesday: Mass Media 9-9:50; Programming I 11-11:50; Intermediate Italian I 1-1:50; Step Aerobics 2-2:50; Introduction to Philosophy 5:30-9:30(for the second 8 weeks of the semester)

Thursday: Introduction to Sociology 9:30-10:45

Friday: Mass Media 9-9:50; Programming I 11-11:50; Intermediate Italian I 1-1:50

Well there you have it. Throw in Refuge on Tuesdays and work whenever I happen to work and if I can get an off campus job and that's my schedule for next semester. Loverly, ain't it? At this point I'll just be glad to finish and forever be done with freshman seminar! Speaking of seminar, I should get back to my paper now... a research documentary on how family(and friends) influence an individual's morals/beliefs. Ugh. That's all I have left to say... ugh. Well, off I go into the wild blue yonder that is seminar and waiting for my mommy to call me back. To tap into my limited Italian skills...

Ti voglio bene (all). Ci vediamo!
I love you (all). See you!

Update and a new pic

2005-04-14T10:18:00.000-07:00

Quick update for everyone while I wait to go to lunch. I know haven't been doing the greatest of updating regularly but I've been pretty busy lately with school. I just changed my major from Music Business emphasis in Production to Audio Engineering Technology with a minor in Computer Science. I also just finished advising which included me having to map out every class I want to take and when for the next three years of school. Last night I got a break and went to see Aslan play at The Basement. It was a good show... those guys are great. Tonight I'm going to see Rob open for Andy Davis at Curb. I'm really excited to see that, it's gonna be a great show. I got some new pics that I have to get up on webshots soon, but until then you'll have to live with this one of me. :-D I'm coming home to NH on May 10 and I'm really excited. Things have been getting better lately which is good, but I'm still eager to get home and see everyone. Well, the time for lunch draws nearer, so I shall go. Peace!

I Just Wanna Live

2005-04-09T10:01:00.000-07:00

Last night I was thinking about some stuff. I was thinking about my friends from home and my friends here and how last semester I felt more at home here than NH and this semester it's the other way around. This semester I've been constantly battling feelings of wanting to drop out and return to NH, at least for the semester. Last night I started thinking about that again. Well, not so much dropping out, at this point I might as well finish the semester. I was thinking about going home for the summer and the possibility of not coming back here to Belmont. I'm not really sure why I've felt so differently this semester than last. For the majority of this semester I haven't really felt like I belong in any group that I've hung out with. There are the people that like to go to parties and clubs and drink and be stupid and they're fun to hang out with but it stops at the parties/clubs. I don't like that kind of partying and I'm not the clubbing type. I've never really had a strong desire to drink nevertheless drink enough to get drunk or even tipsy. Between drinking and smoking, I'd rather smoke... heck I think I might even rather try drugs before getting drunk and that will never happen as far as I'm concerned. Then on the other side of the spectrum there are the people that are extrememly conservative and more like the(and I hate to use this description but it's the best I can think of right now) in-your-face Jesus freaks. Now, don't get me wrong, I love God, I love church, Refuge, my youth group and Bible study back home, all that, but I'm just not the in-your-face kind of person. I really admire the kind of people that can go about their entire day talking about God and thinking about that night's Bible study or whatever, but personally, I want a little more than that. I don't know, maybe that makes me a bad person, I guess I'll have to figure that out on my own. Anyway, I want a happy medium between the two. I don't really want to hang out with people who live to party and I suppose I'd rather hang out with the in-your-face Jesus freaks, but why can't I find the happy medium friends that I have in NH??? I mean, the people I chill with back home are a good balance between loving God and having a lot of fun and I think that's how people should be. I guess I get a lot of mixed signals from my friends here. Sometimes some of them will start leaning toward the other side of the spectrum and I'll start getting really excited for the chance of a balance, then all of a sudden they snap back and I feel left out again. There are a few people here that I feel like I belong with more than the others but for some reason I never hang out with them anymore. I really should. But then, I feel like if I hang out with them my other friends that always hang out with won't want to and then I'll be ditching them and then they'll be hurt, so obviously I can't hang with the people I fit in best with. I think if I don't get out of this place soon, away from these people, I will explode in some manner. Whether it be getting really angry and yelling my lungs out at someone, crying for 24 hours straight, or actually dropping out of school, something will happen and it will be bad. I don't want to hurt anyone and it seems like anytime I so much as mention doing something with another person/group than those that I'm usually with someone, or all the people that I'd be "ditching" make my feel guilty so I don't go and hang out with the other people. I stay and do the same thing I always do and quite frankly it's getting old. I need to do something different. I think I've watched about every movie there is to watch, I've played a crap load of pool and there isn't much else to do on this campus. Next year I'll have my car and be able to go out randomly to do things that I want to do. I'm not sure if this explains at all how I feel, but basically, I feel like I don't fit in anywhere here anymore and I want to get home, the sooner the better.

Another thing that really bothers, especially lately, is that people around here seem to get upset and angry over the stupidest things ever! Not only that but they hold grudges and take their anger/bitterness to a whole new level. They don't really understand the meaning of forgive and forget. Ok, yeah, so sometimes people are gonna let you down and they'll stop being your friend or at least not want to hang out with you all the time(and trust me, I'm not talking about just one or two people) but damnit, GET OVER IT! There are plenty of people out there that you can be friends with. And think about it, maybe if there's a reoccuring pattern of you losing friends, maybe, just maybe, you're doing something wrong! Perhaps you don't treat your friends well enough. Let me explain to anyone who has made it this far in reading my post some of the things I've learned in the past few years:

Most people don't like it when you are constantly putting them down, even if you're just joking about it. After a while, it gets really old and people get really sick of and don't want to your put downs. Let me tell you, when you're more positive to your friends they will like you better and want to be your friend more. Out of the will spawn a good strong friendship. No one likes negativity and if that's all you've got, well, you're screwed as far as friends go. Trust me, I've been there. All of my friendships that are based more around the positive are a lot stronger and make me a lot happier than my friendships that consist of constant put-downs, joking or not. Bluntly, people don't like it when you treat them like shit, especially when you're just trying to make yourself feel better. It doesn't matter if you're usually joking, it gets old fast and people don't want to be around that. Another thing you have to learn is that you can't buy friendship by any means. If you want a good friend you can't bribe them with paying for food or letting them use your stuff all the time or whatever else. It just doesn't work like that. If you bribe people, they'll only stick around for as long as the bribes last and they'll never really be there for you. Just be yourself. Trust that you will find people who will like you and want to be your friend without having to give them anything. Now to tie the two previous lessons together. A good friend will be respectful of you, care about you, and considerate toward you, but you have to be those same things to your friend(s). If you do respect their wishes, who they are, they won't want to stick around. If you are inconsiderate toward them, walk all over them, expect them to do everything for you and you do nothing for them, they won't want to be your friend. If you don't show that you care about the person, they won't care about you and both of you will wind up very hurt. The rules must apply to both people in a friendship. If they don't the friendship won't last, if you can even call it a friendship to begin with. There will be many times that you'll need to compromise and by compromise I don't mean "if you do my thing now we'll do your thing later." Sometimes that will work, but not always. Instead stay for part of your thing and then go do something both of you will enjoy. If it's really important to you to stay for the whole thing your friend should understand. Final lesson for now(cause I'm kinda tired of typing) is this: all friends need time apart. By time apart I don't mean when you part ways for the day to sleep. No, you need to do things without the other every now and then. If you don't, you'll get miserable. Ok, so let's recap(make you hear what I'm saying!). If want a good friendship you have to uplifting, kind, considerate, respectful, caring, you can't buy/bribe your friends, and both people have to follow the rules. Don't always be putting each other down, don't be rude. If your friend gets on your nerves ask them kindly to stop. Don't yell at them unless you absolutely need to to get through to them. If your friend is talking and you want them to stop for some reason(i.e. you want to hear a song or something on tv) ask them to stop talking for a minute so you can hear what you want to listen to. Please, please, please don't just say "Shut up" or something along those lines. I can't tell you how many times someone has said that to me so they could listen to something. It hurts... a lot. The only thing you accomplish in telling/yelling at your friend to shut up is that your friend will get angry and/or hurt not understanding what they did. Ask nicely! I know it sounds cheesy but it's true. Everyone I know, including myself, would much rather hear "Can you please be quiet for a minute? I'd really like to listen to this"(said in a nice tone, not aggravated) than "Shut up"(said in any tone).

Ok, so I'm done now. I'll probably write more about this stuff another time, but hopefully not as long. Let me tell you though, I feel signifcantly better now. I think it's time to eat!

P.S. If I have said or done anything to offend you, please let me know. I don't want to keep offending you. And in the same way, if I am too negative to you, let me know! I don't want to be like that. I would expect that you would do the same for me and be just as willing to change(or at least try!) to make me feel more comfortable around you. :-D

Not sure

2005-04-06T21:59:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure how I feel about the results... I guess it's cool, after all she does hook up with Orlando... wow, stupid girl moment, but hey, it's Orlando Bloom, who'd blame me? :-D

You are Elizabeth Swan "Taylor". Although
you are a nice young lady, you are quite
independant and hate to be tricked. In the
beginning of the movie you are pretty much a
sissy, in the end you turn out alright.

Which Pirates of the Caribbean character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Uhhh

2005-04-06T03:35:00.000-07:00

I think I may be dying... not literally, but my shoulder totally tweeked out earlier tonight. Plus my other arm is completely sunburnt... baseball double header Sunday. On top of that I have felt incredibly ill the past few days, well, since I got the sunburn, so I think I got sun stroke... ugh. I'm really not sure why I'm up right now cause I'm exhausted and have been totally out of it all night. I'm sure anyone you ask would tell you that... Rachel, Melissa, Scott, Matt, Whit, Wes, Valerie, Dave, Christy, Jade..... anyone. I need to go to bed. I was thinking about this and thought I should update a bit. So this is my update, and now I'm going to try to go to bed.... see you in the morning... or rather, later this morning. Peace out

Baseball & Housing

2005-04-02T11:02:00.000-08:00

Today I am going to a baseball double-header and it's only supposed to be in the low 50's. Right now as I look out my window it's cloudy and windy... I'm just glad that college baseball doesn't usually last as long as MLB. I was just told that the double header was pushed back to tomorrow and the single game we were gonna have tomorrow is today. Hooray for only being out there for 3 or 4 hours instead of 7 or 8. Yay! I'm still bringing my big fleece blanket.... that I'm currently wrapped up in. It is so dang cold in this room.

Well, housing is officially taken care of. We're done, we have a place to live, and we have our apartment-mates. Jade and I are going to be living in Hillside 2205 along with our friend Ana and my co-worker Kristi. Yeah, we're in one of the apartments that are changing to doubles.... 4 people living in a 2-bedroom apartment... it'll be interesting. It's cool though, I don't think we'll have many, if any, problems living together. It will definatley be on the cramped side of things, but I think we'll all get along really well. Also next year I'll have my car. HOORAY! I miss my car so much it's ridiculous. I've realized that I really don't like driving anyone else's car no matter how similar it is to my car...it's not my car and I don't want to drive it. I'm not driving home at the end of this semester and I'm very happy about that. My dad found out that it will be about half the cost of driving down and back if I just fly home and ship all my stuff up there UPS style. I also just found out that I can take my Rec Tech final during any of his class' final times which is good. If my finals schedule allows that I should be able to fly home May 9, Monday. I can't wait to get home. Don't get me wrong, I love it down here, but I miss home and everyone there....and no sales tax. Well, I should go get ready for the game. Peace out

Oh man

2005-03-28T17:12:00.000-08:00

Well, hopefully this will make my life a lot easier. It'll probably make some people a little bitter, but it's a lot easier on me... anywho, just writing this to get something on the page. I'll get it set up and write more later.